Curiolympics: Distinctly unsporting events for Londoners
Do you think marathons these days are a bit lightweight? You’re not wrong. With world record times down to nearly two hours, they’re over almost before they’ve begun. If you’re looking for a real test of endurance, try the Cine-marathon: ten hours of grit.
The Prince Charles Cinema on Leicester Square is the official Curiolympic Cine-marathon venue. It’s the only place we know of that provides the necessary training and competition opportunities. A few cinemas run an all-nighter once a month. But this kind of sporadic scheduling is dangerous and only encourages irresponsible dabbling with what is fundamentally a serious endeavour. The Prince Charles provides regular sessions to build stamina, as well as frequent full Cine-marathons.
There are double bills every Monday night. Attending these will maintain a basic level of Cine-marathon fitness. Then over the next couple of months you can build your form with the Back to the Future trilogy (27th August), the pulse-increasing Evil Dead trilogy a few days later (1st September) and the more testing bulk of the Lord of the Rings trilogy at the end of that month (28th September). These trilogies should be considered half cine-marathons.
You’ve also got three stabs at a full Cine-marathon in the next two months. Just around the corner is an epic Muppet Marathon (18th August); all seven muppet films in one sitting. If we say that each film is 90 minutes (and some are longer) that experience clocks in at 10½ hours. That’s a whole lot of Kermit. Next is Wes-Fest (28th September); Wes Anderson’s first five films shown from 21.00-06.20. So long you’ll wish they’d Rushmore. Finally, why not sign up for the Halloween Pyjama Party (6th October)? Six classic horror films screened from 21.00-08.20 to an audience in nightwear. That’s nearly eleven and a half hours of pyjama-clad perseverance.
As you can see, what we’re advocating here is pretty tough. Let’s do the maths. A full Cine-marathon should be upwards of ten hours. That’s essentially five times longer than a running marathon. Or, to put it another way, five times harder than running a marathon.
Train hard and keep the faith.
This piece originally appeared on the Time Out Blog.